Sugar and me definitely have a love/hate relationship. I love how it sweetens up everything from BBQ sauce to cookies; but I don’t like how it makes me feel physically, emotionally and spiritually.
On a practical level I’m also becoming more aware of how sugar pops up in many unsuspecting places such as mayonnaise, salad dressings, pasta sauce, hot sauce, non-dairy milks, and salad dressings, among many others. It’s frustrating how sugar is hiding in a lot of our every day foods so we are possibly eating more than we really want to unintentionally.
I know sugar is also the #1 culprit in triggering my binge eating (with anxiety and stress being a close #2) and has been a major food addiction issue for most of my life. I’ve been a heavy sugar eater since childhood, with unhappy consequences, such as being overweight.
When I say “sugar” I’m referring to it in it’s many forms: cane sugar, molasses, maple syrup, agave nectar, honey, etc.
What I wrestle with is this: Since I am a person with an eating disorder that I am trying to heal, I really try to avoid the temptation to say I’m, “never going to eat a certain food (ie. sugar) ever again!!” It’s an easy mental trap for me to fall into, and it never works. I’ve tried this, oh maybe 1000 times.
So, what’s a girl to do? I have no easy answers for this one, I really wish I did. At the very least I can try to be mindful and aware that sugar is a problem for me. Perhaps not make any grand gestures, like saying I’ll never eat cake again because…that’s ridiculous and unrealistic. And the first thing I would probably do after I say that is go eat cake, probably a couple slices, in a dark room all by myself 🙂
So I am hoping that mindfulness and awareness are the first step in healing my relationship with sugar.
A final note: this is an interesting opinion piece I saw in The New York Times, called “A Month Without Sugar.” It’s definitely a good read.
As always, I love to hear your thoughts.