I’m realizing more and more that for me a big part of healing my eating disorder is simply trying to be consistent with what I do and learning new healthy habits. There is nothing really glamorous or exciting about it, which is actually pretty nice. I’m a person who thrives on structure and having a plan for the day.
However, this being said it’s something that I often struggle with greatly. I have to work hard at sticking to my plan for the day. I can have great intentions but if I’m not careful and mindful about what I’m doing I can easily spend hour after hour on the Internet, reading random stuff (usually the news which is depressing), watch tv endlessly, gorge myself on junk food, and then go to bed exhausted at 2am. I have spent many, many days (months? years?) of my life like this and it’s part of the bigger picture of what I’m trying to heal.
My binge eating is really just a symptom of a larger soul-based problem. Instead of bingeing to run away from my problems, I’m trying instead to seek God first and His love, and have a life of purpose, meaning and self-discipline where my soul is full and happy and I don’t need or want to binge anymore.
What does a healthy, consistent day looks like for me:
- Eat 3 healthy meals, and 1 snack (if needed)
- Pray and work on my spiritual life (read bible, attend bible study, etc)
- Do basic housework, chores and self-maintenance: brush teeth, take a shower, make bed, wash dishes, buy groceries
- Do work
- Visit with family or meet a friend for coffee (once or twice a week)
- Spend time outside in nature, if possible
- Cook dinner
- Read a book (and try not too watch too much tv, if any, honestly)
- Go to sleep at a reasonable time
On the outside this looks like a normal healthy day, you know, maybe nothing special. But for me this is very special. This represents a hugely successful day where I’ve taken proper care of myself, done my work, prayed and spent time with God, maybe met with a friend or family member and gone to bed on time. This is pretty much what an awesome day looks like for me.